Happy New Year 2012! What are you committed to creating in your life this year? What results do you want to have by the end of 2012 so that you can look back on this year with feelings of joy and fulfillment instead of regret?
REGRET.
What regrets have you been carrying around with you? What are you beating yourself up about that you “should have” said or done differently?
Your regrets have important information for you. About what you want and how you would like your life to be.
But most people use their regrets to beat up on themselves. Do you?
Do you tell yourself that you could have been happy, loved, effective, wonderful, insightful, smart, beautiful, successful, wealthy, healthy or _______ (fill in the blank) if you had only done or said something differently?
Of course the implication is that YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER. Back then. If you can see it now and know it now, then you should have seen it then and known it then. That’s the overbearing unruly voice of regret. “If only I had…” “I should have known better.” “I should have done it differently.” “I shouldn’t have done/said that.”
Listen up: Your scared, critical inner gremlin LOVES regret. Regret is the ultimate tactic in your inner critic’s arsenal. Why? Because your inner critic knows that regret is a LIE. But you don’t. I’ll say that again:
REGRET IS A LIE
Your critic knows that when you regret, you’re looking at your past decisions and behavior with the eyes and perceptions that you have now. Your perceptions and understanding of the situation were different back then. As a result of what you have experienced and learned since that time you are a heck of a lot wiser and you see things differently. And because you are wiser and see things differently, if you encountered that same situation now, you would deal with it differently.
So when you regret, you are seeing something with the perception and understanding that you have now. But you didn’t have that perception and understanding then.
Regret is like driving your car while looking in the rearview mirror. You keep looking behind you to see what you have missed. But guess what you’re really missing? The possibilities and opportunities of the road you’re traveling on and the road ahead. And, if you keep looking in the rearview mirror, pretty soon you’ll crash.
The gift of regret is to ask yourself, “What did I learn from this situation so that I can walk this path with more presence, purpose and joy?”
So cast your regrets aside and put your energy and passion into something that matters to you now. Into creating a life that makes your heart sing and drives you to leap out of bed every morning to greet the day filled with possibility.
“All The Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas
Layin’ In The Sun,
Talkin’ ‘Bout The Things
They Woulda-Coulda-Shoulda Done…
But All Those Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas
All Ran Away And Hid
From One Little Did.”
— Shel Silverstein, Cartoonist and Author (1930-1999)
If you don’t know what will make your heart sing or if you are having trouble leaping past the barriers that are holding you back, let’s talk.
Will this be the year that you create the life that you want? Have you been able to do it by yourself yet? Are you ready to invest in yourself?
I have created some packages to work with a limited number of people. These packages are about working one on one with me. Not anyone I have trained. Me. One package is nineteen hours of working with me over six months to get the results that you want.
This is a special offer only for you as a member of the Coaching In A Nutshell community. (Actually my own coach is pleading with me to charge almost twice as much because there is so much personal attention from me. This is not hype. And, yes, I have my own coach to challenge, push and prod me to take my life to where I want it to be. If I could have done it alone, I would have done it a long time ago. I don’t want to look back on 2012 and think “if only…”)
Please email me at [email protected] to talk about how we can work together and which package is right for you.
Here’s a gift for you: I interviewed Debi Berndt (www.attractlovecoach.com), who is an internationally recognized Mindset Expert and has helped thousands of single women in their quest to attract true love with the power of hypnosis (including herself). She is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist and Love Coach and Author of Let Love In: Open Your Heart and Mind to Attract Your Ideal Partner (Wiley).
This interview isn’t just about finding love. It’s about how your powerful mind can help you create your life.
Listen to the interview here: